Mitch Hedberg quotes.
All 5 quotations by Mitch Hedberg in our collection.
“Why is Cloud 9 so amazing? What is wrong with Cloud 8? That joke came off the top of my head, and the top of my head ain't funny!”
“I drank some boiling water because I wanted to whistle.”
“I had a stick of CareFree gum, but it didn't work. I felt pretty good while I was blowing that bubble, but as soon as the gum lost its flavor, I was back to pondering my mortality.”
“I'm a heroine addict. I need to have sex with women who have saved someone's life.”
“I like refried beans. That's why I wanna try fried beans, because maybe they're just as good and we're just wasting time. You don't have to fry them again after all.”
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